it could be a great day anywhere.

i'm tired.

my last day at my job was today. don't fret, dear readers. i have a new job that i start at 10am tomorrow morning. do not lament over my wellness either, for i just came off of a week-long vacation. i will get to all of these things in a moment. for now, i would like to tell you a story about a woman who screamed at me today.

it was a busy sunday at the store. i was knee deep in a skin care consultation with a very sweet and overworked woman with a thick-thighed, fake-baked whorebag of a daughter. she was quietly talking to me about her pores. steph was busy on the other side of the store getting all serious business about styling products with another guest. there were a couple of unattended guests milling around, one of which being a younger woman with two children. these children were running around the store, knocking things over, shrieking, licking the glass, et al. you know, the things that small humans with little to no home training do. i did my best to ignore it and continue to fight the good fight that was my guest's pore size. steph and i finish up with our guests around the same time and usher them into a line that formed between both sides of cash wrap while we weren't looking. fidgety wastes of space who only wanted one hairspray. order online, please. the website does not have sales goals. the woman with the unfortunate children was in my line, and by the time i began to ring up her products, her children where surprisingly quiet. she asked me about parabens in our eyeshadow. i said that our eye color contained two paraben derivatives, both of which were in amounts that were considered negligible to her well-being. she said she didn't want them. i said fair enough. i didn't bother her with frequent buyer cards to try to system sell at the cash wrap. i was speedy and pleasant. she was wearing a shirt with a line drawing of two children hugging a tree. below the drawing it said "hug a tree." clearly, this woman "got" our company's philosophy and thusly supported our environmental mission. i didn't feel the need to explain such things to her. i gave her credit for being in the know.

"could i ask you to save a bag today, or would you like one?"
"uh..yes. i need a bag."
"okay!"
(i walk around cash wrap to hand her the goods in a more personal way than slinging her shit over the counter and say....)
"thanks so much, have a great rest of your day!"
(she YANKS the plastic bag from my hand and starts to walk away. as she reaches the threshold between our store and the mall, she turns to me and says...)
"that's a REALLY odd question, you know."
"oh, is it?"
"YES. OF COURSE I NEED A BAG YOU IDIOT! I JUST BOUGHT SOMETHING!"
"WELL. the ONLY reason i ask is because i CARE about things like..."

this is when i was given the "talk to the hand" motion for the first time in 10 fucking years. then she walked out. what i was going to say to this unfortunate vessel of procreation - had she stayed long enough - was that the only reason i ask is because i care about things like the link between consumerism and waste and that YES, ONE PLASTIC BAG DOES MAKE A DIFFERENCE. if nothing else, being asked if you NEED a bag versus having the ABILITY to not take one makes people question why they take bags. it makes these stupid women justfy having very large and very expensive designer purses. STICK SOMETHING IN IT OTHER THAN YOUR BLACK CARD AND YOUR IPHONE YOU INSIPID, VACCUOUS PIECE OF SHIT.

the other guests in the store were completely appalled. they asked if i was okay. i said i was and that i just didn't appreciate her taking out the dismal result of her introspection concerning her parenting skills out on me in public. they laughed and said i was clever. i worried about what her children would grow up to be like.

however, i didn't let much get to me today as it was my last day working for my company. as some of you know, we lost our team leader (parting was anything but sweet sorrow in that case) in may. i have been running the store as acting team leader since then. for one very, very silly reason, i was passed over for her position. in the interval, i was recruited by 3 different competitors to assume a higher position. i turned all of them down except one. several weeks ago, i accepted a position as store manager of a competing boutique. it should be a more favorable situation for me in many respects, though some of that remains to be seen. my first day is tomorrow. i train in the back for an entire week, then i complete the remaining 7 weeks of my training in my store, with my team. well, what team i am being given. i am told i will need to immediately let go a few and hire a lot more. by the time i acquire my sea legs, it will be holiday already. it is a daunting task, but a task that i have consistently proven i am ready for. i'm very, very excited but i will admit, i teared up when i handed over my store key tonight. 4 years. 4 years i gave.

anyway. the vacation was fabulous. i went to the beach with my sister, her friend, my mother, and my mother's friend. we stayed at a beachfront condo in orange beach, alabama. you can see florida from where we were. it has been dubbed the redneck riviera, and that is how i shall refer to it. i was very, very sunburned. serves me right. the same day i returned home, i picked up a friend from the airport. i use this term with both amusement and trepidation. we spent a week in my city, mainly in restaurants or in my car. it was a good visit for me most part, i think? i learned things about myself and a few things about him, though not as many as i thought i might. i feel lukewarm about it for sophomoric, stupid reasons. i just need to get over it. my constant need to feel appreciated and valued and incredulous - truly, wholly fascinated by someone - is tiring, even for me. i can't imagine what it's like for everyone else.

i need to rediscover what it was like to be 18 years old and invigorated by everything.